Fourth time’s the charm, is that it?
I suspect I have five or six iterations to go.
It might be eleventh time’s the charm.
Or twentieth.
Or nine hundred and seventh.
I suspect I am a poor scribe. I am in progress.
Aren’t we all?
Target: 700 words
Written: 200 words, novella: The Mungk
Read: Make Love! The Bruce Campbell Way
Comics: Danger Girl: Revolver 2-4, Danger Girl/Army Of Darkness 5
Music: Open Your Eyes, Goldfinger (so underrated)Ninety-nine percent of Gen X males who were in either their teens or twenties in the Nineties will also picture themselves as moustachioed detectives sliding across car hoods, Starsky and Hutch style, when the song Sabotage by the Beastie Boys is on.
None of us will think a real life moustache is cool, unless you’re a police officer, porn star or either Tom Selleck or Sam Elliott (like, best ‘stache ever, am I right?)
Target: 700 words
Written: 50 words, novella: The Mungk
Read: Make Love! The Bruce Campbell Way, Ash
Comics: Danger Girl/Army Of Darkness 2-4, Danger Girl: Revolver 1
Music: An Open Letter To NYC, Beastie BoysThere are things that I know to be false and things I know to be true.
We are mostly made of nothing. The whole universe is largely void.
Fact.
Gravity is a thing.
Fact.
Puppies and kittens are cute.
Fact.
And finally, ninety-nine percent of all Gen X males who were either in their teens or twenties during the Nineties will think or say some version of “Oh hell yeah” when the opening chords of Sabotage by the Beastie Boys hits.
True story.
Target: 700 words
Written: 192 words, novella: The Mungk
Read: Make Love! The Bruce Campbell Way, Bruce Campbell
Comics: Danger Girl: Body Shots 2-4, Danger Girl/Army Of Darkness 1 (a Bruce kind of day, apparently)
Music: One Particular Harbour, Jimmy Buffett (and sorry about the Chester crack yesterday, it was uncalled for, especially from a guy who followed it up with Jimmy Buffett and suffers from depression. I should know better. In Chester's defense, the best two songs on this otherwise generic pop album were the ones written by him. They tried something different and it didn't work out. One evolves, sometimes. Sometimes, one just gets off track. Everybody fucks up sometimes.)Well, that’s that. I took the day off yesterday. Slept the morning away.
All the dogs stayed in the bedroom with me. I expected that of Sofi (and Ivy, my brother’s dog we were babysitting for the day). They’re attached at my hip.
But our big girl, our lovable Golden Pyrenees, she stayed beside me all morning as well.
What sweet girls.
Man, I love my dogs.
Our cats, too.
The world is a wonderful place with pets in it. I will never understand why some people don’t like (or outright hate) animals.
Fucking pricks. The world would be a better place with a whole lot more of them, and a whole less of you, you heartless shits.
Target: 700 words
Written: 87 words, novella: The Mungk
Read: The Desire Map, Danielle Laporte
Comics: Danger Girl: Back In Black 2-4, Danger Girl: Body Shots 1
Music: One More Light, Linkin Park (listen, I don't know why Chester killed himself, but I wouldn't doubt this album played a part - what bullshit this was, just a straight pop album, not even subversive or elevated- I can't imagine he was happy with the direction things were going at this point)Scratch that. I know I am.
We all are.
But I think it might be more serious than that.
I haven’t slept properly in weeks, if not months. I get lightheaded regularly. Every joint hurts. I have frequent headaches.
Something is always sitting wrong in my stomach.
I think it’s weight, but I can’t lose anything, even when I’m properly dieting.
I feel like a few days’ sleep would do wonders for me.
What I wouldn’t give for a week long coma.
Target: 700 words
Written: 136 words, novella: The Mungk
Read: The Desire Map, Danielle Laporte
Comics: Danger Girl: Viva Las Danger 1, Danger Girl: Delusions Of Grandeur 1, Batman/Danger Girl 1, Danger Girl: Back In Black 1
Music: One Love, The ProdigyIt’s that time of year again, time to wrangle our hundred-and-twenty pound Golden Pyrenees up a precarious trio of wet tile stairs at the local PetValu to bathe her down. She will be fine (once she gets up there), and then, will be impossible to dry.
But she will be clean.
For about ten minutes.
We’ll do the rat terrier as well, but we could do that in a sink at home, really.
Luckily for us, they’re both good girls.
And we are nothing if not patient (or permissive, I’m not sure which).
Target: 700 words
Written: 99 words, novella: The Mungk
Read: Hans Christian Anderson's Fairy Tales (we've come to the end/of the worst book i've ever read, people think it's hot/i just want it to stop)
Comics: Danger Girl: Mod Bods 1, Danger Girl: Kamikaze 1-2, Danger Girl: Hawaiian Punch 1
Music: One In A Million, SublimeI think it’s time for the whinging to stop (I know that’s not the spelling of whining, but it’s like the British insult version to me).
Whinging.
Win. Jing.
Alrighty, movin’ on then.
Target: 700 words
Written: 152 words, novella: The Mungk
Read: Hans Christian Anderson's Fairy Tales (I think the utter lack of cohesive plotlines or thoughts is driving me insane; even a fairy tale should have a logical flow. How did this ever become famous?)
Comics: Danger Girl 4-7
Music: One Hot Minute, Red Hot Chili PeppersI know it probably looks like I’ve completely checked out on writing, but I’m just in a lull.
My overall total of written words and time spent on The Mungk still exceeds its target by about twenty thousand words, so if I take a few days to regroup before the draft, I have the leeway. It’s one of the reasons why I keep a daily target and a total target.
That way, if there’s days where things go off the rails and the demands on my life leave me with barely time to take a piss, let alone crank out a few hundred words, I have the room.
And this past week?
I’m near to bursting from holding it.
This can’t be healthy.
Target: 700 words
Written: 54 words, novella: The Mungk
Read: Hans Christian Anderson's Fairy Tales
Comics: Danger Girl 0-3
Music: One Foot In The Grave, BeckSo, my whole day was hijacked. For the first time in a long, long time, I got to the end of the day and realized, I hadn’t read a thing, so I sat down and did five minutes before bed.
(This is not helping me get through the 1140-page complete fairy tales of Hans Christian Anderson, already a more tedious read than the bible, but I am a completist and it is “research” for a project down the road).
Did you know Anderson once visited Charles Dickens and turned into the houseguest from hell, extending a short stay into a five week hellscape that forced Dickens to tell him to get the fuck out?
I guess Dickens’ platitudes about charity don’t extended to irritating houseguests.
Anyway, after a morning concert for my father-in-law, some running around, a lengthy dog walk and some pool time with homemade teriyaki burgers and grilled pineapple (made by yours truly), we followed that up with a campfire at my sisters.
The dogs are spent.
And so am I.
Why is it, again, that I am involved with people? Oh right, I actually enjoyed the day, but still, it doesn’t do well for one’s goals to enjoy oneself all the time.
Target: 700 words
Written: 104 words, novella: The Mungk
Read: Hans Christian Anderson's Most Tedious Fucking Stories
Comics: American Vampire 7-10
Music: One Fierce Beer Coaster, Bloodhound GangYou know, you go a while without hearing L7 and you forget they’re one of the hardest rocking bands in existence.
I’ve never seen them live, but I bet it was a fucking trip.
Target: 700 words
Written: 51 words, novella: The Mungk
Read: Hans Christian Anderson's Fairy Tale (like reading by the Bible and just as tedious)
Comics: American Vampire 1976 3-6
Music: One Chord To Another, Sloan