Why we’re taking a sea day in the Bahamas, when there’s a dozen ports we could easily go to… well, it’s just indicative of Carnival’s greed. Stick us out in the ocean with little to do but drink and gamble and most people will drink and gamble. I’m sure they’d justify it all kinds of different ways, and the cruise has been… okay… to this point.

The shows are cheesy, the lines are long and the cruise director’s Jim-Carrey-through-Alan-Cummings impression is more caricature than connecting, and begs the question, what day is this guy going to off himself? The level of self-loathing is palpable, despite the over-the-top attempt at wacky and upbeat cheerleader.

Seriously. Someone needs to do a wellness check on that guy. It’s not going to end well.

The nickel-and-diming is excessive. It’s quite clear from the moment you get on the boat that Carnival sees you only as a cow to be milked for cash, and nothing else. That’s quite off-putting, and would be somewhat acceptable if the quality of the onboard experience were its equal, but it’s all outdated and falling apart, the staff is, for the most part, pretty disengaged.

There are better cruise lines for sure (Viking’s river cruises are stellar), but so far, it is what we’ve made of it, and we’ve had a fair bit of “making of it”.

Personally, my udders hurt.

Target: 400 words
Written: 224 words, novella: The Mungk

Read: The Power Of Now, Eckhart Tolle
Comics: Nailbiter 12-15
Music: Just For College, Radiohead (still, so good)