Fuck it. Fuck it like it’s some kind of hole.
Because it is.
A fucking pit.
Target: 1100 words
Written: 1056 words, novel: Bad Neighbours
Read: The Natural Navigator, Tristan Gooley
Comics: Friends Of Maxx 3, The Maxx 29-31
Music: I'm With You, Red Hot Chili PeppersWell, that was a fun day. Started well enough; turkey in the oven, potatoes scraped and cut and ready to be mashed, Groundhog Day queued up on Prime…
Then we took the dogs for a walk.
We should have turned back when we first started slipping, but no, we’re idiots, so we continued and sure enough, a fall turns to a hospital trip and a broken wrist.
The state of health care in this province is disgusting. I’m glad Doug Ford called an early election, so I can give him a big old middle finger on the ballot.
Cons, man. Describes them perfectly.
Target: 1100 words
Written: 273 words, novel: Bad Neighbours
Read: The Natural Navigator, Tristan Gooley
Comics: The Maxx 26-28, Friends Of Maxx 2
Music: I'll Stick Around, Foo FightersHere we go. The dumb fuck did it. Shooting himself in the foot, because he’s too insecure in his person (and his manhood) to be a reasonable human being.
Seriously, the entire world is getting fucked because this man’s monstrous ego has grown so deeply out of proportion, because he can’t or won’t address how deeply insecure he is. How incompetent. How actually bad at all the things he claims to be good at he is.
All this for one man’s penis envy.
What a pathetic, sad, little man.
Target: 1100 words
Written: 891 words, novel: Bad Neighbours
Read: The Natural Navigator, Tristan Gooley
Comics: The Maxx 23-25, Friends Of Maxx 1
Music: Ill Communication, Beastie Boys (droppin' science)I miss the comfort in being sad, as Kurt Cobain once opined.
Being sad is bad. But it’s better than in a constant of conflict. One can accept sadness as it is, live in it, find one’s way through it.
Conflict for the sake of conflict?
It’s going to be a tough go while I’m working at Bad Neighbours and it’s the constant contemplation of the incompatibility of viewpoints, left and right, and the futility of anger.
The inability of consequence. The pure rage of missing justice.
The absence of karma, or rather, its lethargic, procrastinating nature.
It may come around, but when? And how fucking long?
Quite frankly, too many assholes have died peacefully in their sleep on top of their piles of money, surrounded by a beautiful wife, successful children and a mistress with glittery fake boobs.
Karma does not reward waiting.
Justice is not automatic.
Target: 1100 words
Written: 920 words, novel: Bad Neighbours
Read: Amatka, Karin Tidbeck
Comics: The Maxx 20-22, Gen13/Maxx 1
Music: II, Presidents Of The United States Of AmericaHit 161/107 last night.
That ain’t great.
It’s come down a bit since, but it’s still rollin’.
Pounding headache, all it would take it one spike for brain death.
I don’t want to die. Not yet.
I would like this to stop.
I’m eating better. Exercising. And it’s getting worse.
Target: 1100 words
Written: 920 words, novel: Bad Neighbours
Read: Amatka, Karin Tidbeck
Comics: The Maxx 16-19
Music: Ignition, The OffspringAm I spelling that right?
Apparently, they suck.
Target: 1100 words
Written: 1444 words, novel: Bad Neighbours
Read: Amatka, Karin Tidbeck
Comics: The Max 12-15
Music: If You Want Blood, You've Got It, AC/DC (I will defend this choice to the death - for popcorn bands that are actually right into what they do and not just posturing, there's no band like them)I’m doing it again. I feel like giving up, starting over, losing more time, more years, more precious life force, precious focus.
Christ, at this point, maybe heaven’s a better option. Or would be, if I believed in an afterlife.
In any just afterlife, we’d spend eternity finding out all the things we’d ever wanted to know, to experience all the things we ever wanted to experience, to be all the people we ever wanted to be, to relive moments of our lives in as many permutations as we choose, to see what it really would have felt like to take that stand, to try that thing, to make that move on someone special.
Much of it would be unpleasant, but without the endless self-deception, with the ability to try again and learn and grow and be better, what would there be to lose?
Lifetimes lived in an instant. Fantastical trips beyond imagination. Relationships won and lost, friendships gained, battles fought, tyrants brought low by our actions. Our dedication.
Of course, that’s speculation.
But to attempt to live life as it is, good and bad, filled with glory and tragedy, joy and pain, fully engaged with it, stripping away all our blinders?
We may have a limited amount of time to do it in, but it’s still worth the trip.
Target: 1100 words
Written: 1581 words, novel: Bad Neighbours
Read: Ready Player One, Ernest Cline
Comics: The Maxx 8-11
Music: If I Should Fall From Grace With God, The PoguesYeah, it ain’t going down.
I’m not saying it’s time to drag profiteers and corrupt politicians out of their homes and in front of a judge, but…
Wait. That may be exactly what I’m saying.
All billionaires must be brought to justice.
Target: 1100 words
Written: 1258 words, novel: Bad Neighbours
Read: Ready Player One, Ernest Cline
Comics: The Maxx 4-7
Music: If All Goes Wrong, Smashing Pumpkins (wow, just... wow. A handful of decent songs and some good points regarding the nature of artistic evolution and fandom, but the egos involved... just. Wow.)I’m not satisfied with my performance. Obviously.
I’ve got several pieces that need to go out, but I can’t find the time or the energy to actually do it. I mean, it’s ridiculous that I won’t.
How the hell is anything going to get published if I don’t let anyone else look at it?
Also, I’m really unhappy with what I did today toward the novel.
I have this whole Grumpy Old Men concept breeding with a “state of politics” idea brewing, but instead, I wrote the main character as a stuck up ass-kissing effete.
He’s supposed to be modern liberal satire; a Democrat who thinks rules actually mean something to the boorish neighbour who has bought off the police and local government.
But instead, it’s shit; I have a feel for the character. What I wrote wasn’t it.
The only thing I can think of is to move on. Rewriting at this point is always an option, even if it’s not happening today.
Fuck. Today sucks.
Target: 1100 words
Written: 2545 words, novel: Bad Neighbours
Read: Ready Player One, Ernest Cline
Comics: The Maxx 1-3, 0.5
Music: The Idler Wheel Is Wiser Than The Driver Of The Screw And The Whipping Cords Will Serve You More Than Ropes Will Ever Do, Fiona Apple (love her to death, but damn, lady. Your album titles need editing.)It’s the basis of any good story, but it’s the bane of our existence.
How much nicer would the world be if we were all just a little… nicer?
Is that really such a hard thing to do, you fucking toddlers?
Target: 1000 words
Written: 256 words, Novel: Bad Neighbours
Read: Ready Player One, Ernest Cline
Comics: The Darkness/Pitt 1-3, Darker Image 1
Music: I'd Rather Be In Japan!!!, Anti-Flag/Obnoxious