Author: admin

of long walks

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I’ve walked probably about fifty New York City blocks of varying lengths and my dogs are barking.

I appreciate what the city has to offer and all, but damn.

I am peopled the fuck out.

There are too many people on this planet. I’m not calling for a plague or anything, but like, stop breeding, people.

Republicans claim to be pro-life, but man, abortion is one of the many ways we can help this planet by not contributing to overpopulation, unhappiness, children and parents in poverty or abuse, because they weren’t ready and didn’t want kids… you’re contributing to fucking misery and death, the death of us all, with your anti-environmental, anti-woman, anti-life stances.

Like fucking vegans, you’ve taken a high-minded principle (don’t abort fetuses or eat animals), and missed the actual real world impact of such a stance, both from a moral, and historical standpoint.

The most “noble” of intentions based on completely flawed premises (of course, I’d also argue that vegans may actually have noble intentions, but Republicans, given their pro-gun, pro-capital punishment and pro-who-gives-a-fuck-what-happens-to-the-kid-after-they’re-born stance, are entirely disin-fucking-genuous).

Anyway, people. Keep fucking, but stop breeding, for Pete’s sake, whoever Pete is.

Target: 700 words
Written: 962 words, novella: The Mungk

Read: Assholes Finish First, Tucker Max
Comics: Danger Girl: Renegade 3-4
Music: OK Go, OK Go

merrily we roll along

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I usually hate musicals (and parts of this I didn’t care for), but this was still pretty good.

I guess maybe I’m okay with musical comedies?

If they star Daniel Radcliffe and Jonathan Groff?

Yeah?

Maybe?

Target: 700 words
Written: 1382 words, novella: The Mungk

Read: It Devours!, Joseph Fink, Jeffrey Cranor
Comics: Danger Girl: Mayday 3-4, Danger Girl: Renegade 1-2
Music: OK Computer, Radiohead (been a while, but it never fails to remind me why it's considered one of the best. albums. ever.)

chelsea morning

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I think if I lived in New York, it’d be in Chelsea. Something about the vibe.

Of course, I hate people and I could never afford it, but you know, the vibe.

Still, space and quiet are more important to me. And besides, I’ve never bought into this idea that because something is from a big city, it’s automatically “better”. Street food in New York is no better than street food anywhere else (and I’ll die on the hill that Chicago dogs are the absolute fucking pinnacle of that kind of street food – New York’s is generic shit).

I might even say Chicago deep dish is better than New York pizza, that, in fact, having had pizza in many different parts of the world, I would actually rank New York pizza lower than most.

Toronto is the same fucking way. This attitude that bigger is better is idiotic. That might be true of Broadway shows, but let’s face it, a small indie flick usually has infinitely more depth and quality than a big budget action thriller or a star-driven rom-com.

Sometimes, the actual jungle is cooler is than the concrete one.

Target: 700 words
Written: 497 words, novella: The Mungk

Read: It Devours!, Night Valians
Comics: Danger Girl: The Chase 3-4, Danger Girl: Mayday 1-2
Music: Oingo Boingo Essentials, Oingo Boingo

fifteen years

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Here we are, at Tony DiNapoli’s in New York City, my lovely wife and I (and our daughter), enjoying family style fettucine alfredo and baked ziti over a glass of Chianti, because we can. Because we’ve been married for fifteen lovely years, together for seventeen.

I don’t necessarily believe in the reality of monogamy (and I think the insistence causes a lot of unhappiness in the world), but I wouldn’t choose anyone else to share these years with.

I can, without any doubt, say that I am a better man today for her, and for me.

Happy anniversary, darling.

Target: 700 words
Written: 293 words, novella: The Mungk

Read: It Devours!, The Night Vale Guys
Comics: Danger Girl: Trinity 3-4, Danger Girl: The Chase 1-2
Music: Oil & Gold, Shriekback

new york bound

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I can’t afford this trip, but my daughter and wife decided we must go see some musical with Daniel Radcliffe on Broadway.

I hate musicals, but Daniel Radcliffe’s pretty great and I guess, the rest of New York is all right.

So we’ll do this, regret it later, and I’ll probably have to work a bunch of OT to catch up.

Fuck me.

Target: 700 words
Written: 367 words, novella: The Mungk

Read: Fully Engaged, Thomas Sterner
Comics: Danger Girl/G.I. Joe 3-4, Danger Girl: Trinity 1-2
Music: Oi To The World, The Vandals (still the king of Christmas albums)

isolation

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I think I like it. I mean, I know I need interaction with people, but damn, would I like large chunks of my day to be just me.

And those remaining parts with people with whom I can truly open up.

The rest?

Silence.

Silence. Isolation. Getting lost in the music, the book, the show, the act.

I feel closer to connection with the universe when there’s no one around.

Target: 700 words
Written: 843 words, novella: The Mungk

Read: Make Love! The Bruce Campbell Way, yes, that Bruce Campbell
Comics: Danger Girl/Army Of Darkness 6, Danger Girl/G.I.Joe 1-3
Music: Oh, Inverted World, The Shins

next draft

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Fourth time’s the charm, is that it?

I suspect I have five or six iterations to go.

It might be eleventh time’s the charm.

Or twentieth.

Or nine hundred and seventh.

I suspect I am a poor scribe. I am in progress.

Aren’t we all?

Target: 700 words
Written: 200 words, novella: The Mungk

Read: Make Love! The Bruce Campbell Way
Comics: Danger Girl: Revolver 2-4, Danger Girl/Army Of Darkness 5
Music: Oh No, OK GO (so underrated, these guys)

also fact

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Ninety-nine percent of Gen X males who were in either their teens or twenties in the Nineties will also picture themselves as moustachioed detectives sliding across car hoods, Starsky and Hutch style, when the song Sabotage by the Beastie Boys is on.

None of us will think a real life moustache is cool, unless you’re a police officer, porn star or either Tom Selleck or Sam Elliott (like, best ‘stache ever, am I right?)

Target: 700 words
Written: 50 words, novella: The Mungk

Read: Make Love! The Bruce Campbell Way, Ash
Comics: Danger Girl/Army Of Darkness 2-4, Danger Girl: Revolver 1
Music: Oh Love, Green Day

facts

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There are things that I know to be false and things I know to be true.

We are mostly made of nothing. The whole universe is largely void.

Fact.

Gravity is a thing.

Fact.

Puppies and kittens are cute.

Fact.

Finally, ninety-nine percent of all Gen X males who were either in their teens or twenties during the Nineties will think or say some version of “Oh hell yeah” when the opening chords of Sabotage by the Beastie Boys hits.

True story.

Target: 700 words
Written: 192 words, novella: The Mungk

Read: Make Love! The Bruce Campbell Way, Bruce Campbell
Comics: Danger Girl: Body Shots 2-4, Danger Girl/Army Of Darkness 1 (a Bruce kind of day, apparently)
Music: Oh Boy - The Best Of Buddy Holly & The Crickets, Buddy Holly (& The Crickets)

sick day

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Well, that’s that. I took the day off yesterday. Slept the morning away.

All the dogs stayed in the bedroom with me. I expected that of Sofi (and Ivy, my brother’s dog we were babysitting for the day). They’re attached at my hip.

But our big girl, our lovable Golden Pyrenees, she stayed beside me all morning as well.

What sweet girls.

Man, I love my dogs.

Our cats, too.

The world is a wonderful place with pets in it. I will never understand why some people don’t like (or outright hate) animals.

Fucking pricks. The world would be a better place with a whole lot more of them, and a whole less of you, you heartless shits.

Target: 700 words
Written: 87 words, novella: The Mungk

Read: The Desire Map, Danielle Laporte
Comics: Danger Girl: Back In Black 2-4, Danger Girl: Body Shots 1
Music: The Offspring, The Offspring (wherefore art my offspring)